BRICK – After waiting nearly two years, Bethy DeTata, 38, was delighted to get her third service dog (over the course of 20 years) since her previous dog died suddenly of cancer at only eight years old.
Bethy and her parents, Sue and Jim, live in the Laurelton Heights section of Brick in a home where they raised their six children.
Bethy and her identical twin sister were born healthy, but Bethy got meningitis when she was a week old which left her profoundly deaf, unable to speak and with cerebral palsy.
She was able to walk independently, but after suffering two falls – one in 2012 and another in 2021 that damaged the nerves in her cervical spine – she is only able to walk with assistance.
The couple communicates with their daughter through sign language, but because of the effect of cerebral palsy on Bethy’s hands, it’s difficult for her to sign back.
“We know her signs, but somebody else who knows American Sign Language wouldn’t, so it’s difficult,” Sue said.
Having a service dog is life-changing for Bethy, said her parents, who work as a facilitated team for her new service dog, Kamden, a Labrador/golden retriever mix.
Bethy has very little down time, and her parents keep a dry erase calendar that has at least two scheduled outings a day.
“She wants to be out and about doing things,” said Sue. “We’re always trying to find things to do – she doesn’t want to sit and watch TV.”
For 16 years Bethy has volunteered one day a week at the local hospital, pushing a mailcart to the different departments, now with Kamden at her side.
“Obviously she can’t do it herself – she needs a lot of assistance to be successful, but she can still be successful with that help,” said Sue. “And she enjoys volunteering since she could never get a regular job.”
She also volunteers at a special needs cafe in Lake Como where she helps to clean the tables and water the plants.
The DeTata family, including Bethy, Sue and Jim, were recently joined by Kamden. (Photo by Judy Smestad-Nunn)
Bethy belongs to six challenger groups in surrounding towns, and with Kamden, and one or both of her parents, she attends dances, parties, Special Olympics, bowling, cooking classes, ice hockey and much more.
In addition to everything Kamden does, a service dog is an icebreaker, said Jim.
“When someone’s not familiar with a special needs individual, they kind of stay away, but the dog is like a magnet,” Sue said.
“That’s one of the reasons we got the dog, because Bethy is nonverbal and really, non-mobile, so she doesn’t have any friends, so the dog fills that gap of being her best friend,” said Jim.
While Bethy can’t take care of the dog’s basic needs, she signals to Kamden that he can eat. She can sit in a low seat where she is close enough to her dog to play fetch.
“We try to let her do as much as she can,” Sue said.
“She feels like she has something that’s hers, and it’s her responsibility to take care of the dog,” Jim added.
In an effort to expand Bethy’s social circle, the family has been attending church dinners because they have found that church people are very welcoming.
Canine Companions for Independence provides highly trained assistance dogs to children, adults and veterans with disabilities. There is no charge for the dog, its training and a lifetime of ongoing follow-up services, and the organization is funded by donations, grants, fundraising and corporate partnerships.
The non-profit organization has placed more than 8,000 service dogs since their founding in 1975 and has more than 600 people on the waitlist.
Each canine companion spends the first 18 months with a volunteer puppy raiser, who teaches them basic tasks and socialization skills. Afterwards, Canine Companions for Independence trains the dog at a regional center for six months of intensive service dog training.
Kamden was presented to Bethy and her parents in an emotional graduation ceremony held in Delaware on August 9. The puppy raiser was invited up and handed the leash over to Bethy.
“On her own they would never give Bethy a dog because we are the ones that take care of the dog, command the dog – that’s where we come in – but it’s her dog.” said Sue.
Canine Companions for Independence knew that Bethy needed a certain kind of dog, one that is calm and patient and not distractible, Sue said. Kamden was worth the wait, because he is exactly what Bethy needed, she added.
Kamden knows about 50 commands, from picking up objects, opening and closing doors by tugging on a rope attached to the doorknob, pushing handicapped-acceptable buttons on doors, and much more.
Asked if they ever get a break from their caregiving duties, Sue and Jim said not really.
“Speaking for myself, I’m not talking for Sue, I don’t really want a break, I want her with me,” Jim said.
The busy family is very close, with all but one of Bethy’s siblings living in New Jersey. They have nine grandchildren and a tenth one on the way.
September is National Service Dog Month that celebrates the impact these animals make on people with disabilities. For more information visit canine.org
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