BERKELEY – Ed Graichen meant a lot to a lot of people.
As a husband, father, grandfather, all-around family man, athletics coach and educator, the 1965 Toms River High School graduate left an indelible stamp on thousands.
Graichen, lost to natural causes at the age of 79, was honored by hundreds of admirers with a four-hour Visitation at the Anderson & Campbell Funeral Home in Toms River and a Funeral Mass at the St. Barnabas Catholic Church in Berkeley.
The life of the gregarious Graichen was depicted with a slide show and numerous photographs at the Visitation. Memorabilia was displayed. One sign said, “Without you we couldn’t have done it.”
There were few tears. Instead, there were plenty of smiles, laughs and embraces. The event was more of a Celebration of Life than a solemn Visitation.
“Love it, love it,” a son, Todd, said while greeting family and friends a few feet from his dad’s open casket. “A celebration. Great guy. What is so comforting is that so many people thought great things about him.”
“I don’t know where to start,” another son, Chad, said while standing alongside his brother. “I am overwhelmed. Dad touched the hearts of so many people. He touched people’s lives. He is a legend and will forever be a legend. I will forever miss him.”
In Graichen’s casket was a maroon and white sign in South’s colors that said, “Mr. Ed Graichen Director of Guidance.” His Gator nickname was noted in a green and white sign in the casket.
“The nickname originated from dad’s days of playing in the American Professional Baseball Association, a fantasy league,” Todd Graichen said. “He very much liked the nickname to the point where everyone who knew him called him Gator. Dad even owned an arcade in Bayville (a section of Berkeley Township) for many years that was called Gator’s.”
Graichen, who coached at Central Regional, Lacey, Toms River South and Monsignor Donovan, touched the life of many a child.
Just ask 1989 Lacey graduate Jim Tweed, who played football under coach Lou Vircillo and served as the head boys’ track and field coach at Manalapan for 17 years, the head girls’ track and field coach at Jackson Memorial for two seasons and the head boys’ track and field coach for three seasons at Highland Park High School.
“This one hurts a lot … as we age, we know it is natural for people to pass, as we will one day, too, but Mr. Graichen’s passing is incredibly hard to come to grips with,” Tweed said. “Some educators teach lessons – Mr. Ed Graichen changed lives. At Lacey Township High School, he was more than a guidance counselor; he was a steady hand, a calm voice and the kind of mentor who never gave up on a ‘challenging’ kid. I know that firsthand.
“I put him through the wringer more than a few times, yet he showed up every single time with patience, honesty and belief in me when I hadn’t quite learned to believe in myself. He was a mentor, a friend and a trusted influence in the lives of so many and I am forever grateful that I was one of them,” he said.
Graichen, who resided in Ocean Gate, coached Lacey’s first boys’ soccer team in 1981.
With Graichen leading the way, the Lions won the New Jersey State Interscholastic Athletic Association South Jersey Group II title in 1984 and the New Jersey State Interscholastic Athletic Association South Jersey Group III title and the Shore Conference Class B South championship in 1992. They were 15-3-1, including 5-0-1 in Class B South, in 1992.
Graichen’s career reached its zenith, its apex in 2001 and 2002 as South’s girls’ soccer coach. His 2001 and 2002 teams won Class A South, South Jersey Group III and Group III state championships. His 2001 club won the Shore Conference Tournament. The 2001 team was 20-2 overall. The 2002 club was 21-1-2.The 2002 Indians were ranked in the Top 25 by Adidas – National Soccer Coaches America.
The 2001 team was ranked second in the state of New Jersey by the Star-Ledger. Both teams were inducted into the Toms River Regional Schools Athletic Hall of Fame on May 8, 2020.
Tom Brown was an assistant coach under Graichen from 2000-2002. John Truhan, Susan Sutaris, Sarah Allen-Paturzo and Gavin DeCapua were on the coaching staff in 2001 and 2002, Brown noted.
“On the field, coach Graichen was surprisingly intense,” Brown said. “He had clear expectations of his staff and players. He expected his assistant coaches to coach and he valued our input. Off the field, he was generous with his time and advice. He was fun to hang out with outside of work. He was like a fun uncle. We were winning trophies so it was a lot of fun.”
Brown said Graichen was a well-rounded coach.
“If he’d only been successful at South, it would be easy to say we had great players, which we did,” Brown said. “Since he was successful everywhere, it must have been more than that. He knew his player’s strengths and weaknesses and always put them in a position to succeed. He knew his opponents and prepared for them, but he also worked on what he wanted the team to do and on the ways we could control a game.”
Graichen had a profound impact on the Indians.
“He’s part of the great history of soccer,” Brown said. “He played for the legendary Les Konyhas (at Toms River where he was the first goalkeeper in school history) and made a name for himself as a highly successful coach at Central and Lacey. He returned Toms River South girls’ soccer to greatness not seen since the early 1980s and coach Jim Maguire. As an educator, he shaped the guidance department at South in ways that are still felt today.”
Brick Memorial girls’ soccer coach Billy Caruso, who guided the Mustangs to Group IV state titles in 1999, 2002, 2003 and 2004, shared fond memories of Graichen and his Indians.
“One of my favorite memories is the year South and Brick Memorial won state championships,” he said. “Back then, there were not a lot of artificial turf fields in the state so teams would train at Good Sports USA during the week leading up to their championship games (on the artificial turf at The College of New Jersey). One afternoon, South had the time slot before us for training. When we walked into the bubble, their girls and coaches gave us a round of applause as we walked in.
“A few days later, our game followed South’s. South had won a state championship and we gave them a round of applause as we were preparing for our game. I was able to talk to Ed and coach Brown for a few seconds – Ed was obviously super excited – and he told me, ‘Now you go get yours!’ It was a great moment for Ocean County and Shore Conference soccer – one that I will always remember!”
Graichen, who also played basketball for the Indians, was inducted into the New Jersey Interscholastic Coaches Hall of Fame in 2002. He was named the South Region Coach of the Year at South in 2000 by the New Jersey Girls Soccer Coaches Association after taking the Indians to a 16-5-2 overall record.
“Thank you for your leadership, dedication and encouragement during a great season,” it said on a plaque displayed at the Visitation. “You taught us to be winners.”
Brown coached the Indians from 2003-2006, replacing Graichen.
“On the field, coach Graichen made me a better coach,” Brown said. “He valued my opinion and wanted my input. We connected because we were both old goalkeepers (Brown played in the net at South) so we both saw the game from that perspective. Off the field, he was instrumental in helping me secure a full time teaching position at South where I stayed until my recent retirement.”
With Graichen an assistant coach under the legendary Ken Frank, the Hitting Indians won several baseball titles. South (26-6) captured Shore Conference Tournament, South Jersey Group III and Group III state championships in 1998.
“Thanks for being a part of our baseball program,” it said on a plaque displayed at the ceremony.
Graichen was inducted into the Toms River South Baseball Hall of Fame in 2002. He was named Indian of the Year by the Class of 2002.
Todd Frazier of Toms River East American Little League, South, Rutgers University, major league baseball, YES Network, ESPN and ESPN2 fame, attended the Visitation. He viewed memorabilia, embraced Graichen’s sons, exchanged pleasantries and laughs with both and kneeled and prayed at the casket.
“He meant a lot to me,” said Frazier, who powered the Indians to Group III titles in 2002 and 2003. “From the bench, he called a pitch, a fastball down and in, correctly and the next thing I knew I hit a three-run homer. He said, ‘I told you, Big Dog.’ He kick started the team. He had a big, loud voice. He called me, ‘Toddo.’”
Frazier recalled that Graichen coached a brother, Jeff, who starred at South and Rutgers and played briefly in the major leagues.
“Coach Graichen never stepped on anyone’s toes,” Todd Frazier said. “He said, ‘Drop your hands. Forget about the play you just made. Get after it. He never embarrassed you. During the last four or five years he texted me, he told me how grateful he was to have known me and how proud he was to see me on tv.”
Ed Sarluca, a veteran Jersey Shore sports figure, said at the Visitation, “Ed was an original member of the Luch Football League, a fantasy league. I knew him for 45 years. He was a good friend, always fun to be around. Great coach. Not a rah rah guy. Low key. Always got along so well with the kids. Sat back, taught the fundamentals and watched the kids play the game. An exceptional coach.”
Retired Toms River East girls’ basketball and football coach and Toms River Regional School District athletics director Joe Arminio said at the Visitation, “Ed always had a smile on his face. He touched so many lives. He always made a bad situation a little better. I am sure he is feeling the love in the room. As a guidance counselor and guidance director, he was responsible for putting kids in the right direction for their futures. That’s for sure.”
Retired South assistant baseball coach Paul Barnoski said at the Visitation, “Ed was a first baseman as a player. Someone said his mitt is buried under first base at South similar to Jimmy Hoffa. Ed was very positive in the dugout. An error was made. He would talk sense to a kid and say, ‘There is another inning.’
“My wife, Eve, worked with Ed’s wife (Kathy) at the Cedar Grove Elementary School. Kathy battled an illness. She brought Kathy to the baseball field while Ed was coaching and Kathy said, ‘I’m not in any pain.’ “
Kathy Graichen died in October of 2000 at the age of 51. A son, Scott, died at birth in 1976. Another son, Matthew, died in 2019 at age 35. Coach Graichen, his wife and sons are buried at the St. Joseph’s Catholic Cemetery and Mausoleums. Father Carlos A. Florez of St. Barnabas spoke at coach Graichen’s funeral Mass.
“Father Carlos spoke very kindly of our father because he was a parishioner there,” Todd Graichen said.
Coach Graichen did not let adversity wear him down.
“Dad always had a strong support system of friends, colleagues and players who were there for him,” Todd Graichen said. “My father was always a positive person and this helped him through many tough times.”
Working as a Central assistant coach under the legendary Al Kunzman, Graichen helped the 1980 Golden Eagles to a 23-8 overall record, a division title and Ocean County Tournament and Shore Conference Tournament championships. Among the Golden Eagles were future major league pitchers Jeff Musselman and Mark Leiter Sr.
Graichen captained the Indians’ baseball team with Butch Anderson and attended Seton Hall University on a baseball scholarship, graduating in 1969. Graichen coached baseball at Lacey. He was a Donovan guidance counselor and an assistant girls’ basketball and girls’ softball coach at the school after retiring at South. He also was an educator at Central.
Retired Donovan guidance department director Bill Vanore said at the Visitation, “We were members of the Ocean County Personnel Guidance Association in 1997. He was unbelievable to work with as he had a breadth of knowledge and experience. I went to Ed for help. He never had a bad word to say about anybody. He deeply cared for his students. He was a legend as a person.”
Graichen won the Seaside Park Softball League’s Sportsmanship Award in 2017 and the Lifetime Achieving Excellence Award in 2025, starring at first base for Klee’s Bar & Grill and Henry’s Playland. The latter is the league’s most special award.
“When I wanted to create a Sportsmanship Award – something I felt the league needed and was so important – the person and athlete who came to mind was Ed,” league president Jeff Potter said. “He was an excellent first baseman. He had already retired from active playing, but his name always came up. Admired by so many. Fair. Respectful. Generous behavior. Gracious whether winning or losing. Great character. Had all of the attributes of sportsmanship. An easy choice.
“Level headed. Steady. Calm. Genuine. Kind hearted. Caring. Passionate. A leader. While he didn’t speak often, we will miss his guidance. His legacy is the guidance he provided to so many, his coaching, his building character and his leadership. He mentored so many whether it was for sports or something else. He was a very special person and I hope to have half of the qualities he had.”
Potter said Graichen leaves an everlasting mark on the league: “A legend and icon symbolizes an individual with immense influence, enduring fame and a lasting, transformative impact … it represents someone whose reputation transcends time. Such was the life of Edward F. Graichen.”
The post Ocean County Coach Graichen Remembered By Hundreds appeared first on Jersey Shore Online.