TOMS RIVER – When Toms River High School South’s Class of 2025 gathers to celebrate their graduation this June, one graduate will stand out not just for her title as valedictorian, but for her heart.
Eighteen-year-old Grace Rhine has spent her high school years doing more than earning top grades and excelling in competitive swimming and cheerleading. She founded the school’s Adopt-a-Grandparent Club, an initiative that’s changing lives – one song, one memory, and one conversation at a time.
“I watched dementia steal everything from my nanny,” Grace said. “Starting with her memories and ending with her smile.”
Inspired By Love And Loss
Grace’s idea for the club grew from a personal loss that she never forgot. When she was just ten years old, her great-grandmother, Joan “Nanny” Kretchman, passed away at 83 after battling Lewy body dementia.
Grace vividly remembers visiting her nanny at Hampton Ridge Healthcare and Rehabilitation Center, feeling helpless as the woman she loved slowly lost her ability to communicate.
Years later, that memory resurfaced when Grace met Yvette Atkins from Caregiver Volunteers of Central Jersey, who introduced her to the Connect Thru Music program – a volunteer initiative where students play personalized playlists to help spark memories in seniors living with dementia and Alzheimer’s disease. The idea was inspired by the documentary “Alive Inside,” which showed music’s profound effect on individuals living with memory loss.
A young Grace with her great-grandmother, Joan “Nanny” Kretchman. (Photo courtesy Rhine family)
Determined to get her school involved, Grace proposed creating an Adopt-a-Grandparent club as part of her Girl Scout Gold Award project. She had to gather student signatures, find a faculty advisor, and work with the school board to get official approval.
Once approved, training was critical. Volunteers gathered at the school and public library, where Atkins taught them how to work with dementia patients, including how to gently redirect conversations when seniors talked about loved ones who had passed.
“We learned how important it is to never correct them or tell them bad news,” said Grace. “You have to meet them where they are and make them feel safe.”
Students were also taught to prepare playlists carefully matched to each senior’s formative years – usually songs from when they were 10 to 25 years old.
Making Connections That Matter
Toms River High School South students were matched with seniors in the Memory Unit Residence at Brandywine Reflections Senior Living in Brick. Each volunteer committed to spending an hour a week visiting their “adopted grandparent,” sharing music, conversation, and company.
For Grace, that meant forming a special bond with Marie Savino, a resident who is blind and brimming with life stories.
“She’s amazing,” Grace said. “She went to college in New York City and even earned her master’s degree.”
Sometimes the visits are lively, with live music and trivia games. Other days are quieter, filled with heartfelt conversations or simply sitting together listening to music.
Toms River High School South’s 2025 Valedictorian Grace Rhine’s legacy includes founding of the Adopt-a-Grandparent Club. (Photo by Stephanie Faughnan)
One powerful moment Grace shared was when Marie, trying to open her eyelids, asked how Grace could see.
“It really made me realize how lucky I am,” Grace reflected. “Marie isn’t bitter about it. She taught me that you have to play the hand you’re dealt with grace and joy.”
Through music, Grace discovered a key to Marie’s happiest memories – especially around Yankees games she attended with her father.
“One day I played a song, and Marie lit up talking about going to Yankees games,” Grace said, smiling. “She said they never play the Yankees for her. That moment felt magical.” It turns out that the television was muted when the games were on, which didn’t allow Marie to enjoy them.
Marie especially connected with Elton John’s “Rocket Man,” a song that often brought back vivid memories. Marie’s sister, Linda Bross said she’s noticed Marie intermingle more whenever Grace plays music.
“The moment a young person walks into the room and shows an interest in the resident and their music, you can see the whole person come alive,” Atkins said. “It’s just amazing to witness.”
Atkins credited Grace for coming up with the partnership between the school and the Connect Thru Music program. Today, multiple high schools are involved, and student and resident feedback has been overwhelmingly positive.
Nevertheless, the connections formed can come with challenges. Some students have faced the heartbreaking loss of their adopted grandparents.
“It’s sad when someone you’ve bonded with passes away,” Grace admitted. “But to know you made their last months a little brighter – that’s something you carry forever.”
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